I really haven’t fallen off the face of the world. I’m still here living my crazy life. Things just really starting getting out of
control for me this winter, and this little blog is one of the things that had
to move to the back burner.
I found out my younger brother has cancer… and the Dr’s are
not giving him a good recovery outcome.
I have a hard time not concentrating on all the things he could possibly
miss out on in his life. He started
another round of chemo again last week.
This has really put life in a different perspective for me. Knowing what he is going through and the
torture his body is experiencing leaves less time for me to think about myself
and my infertility. Our extended family
has had bad luck with cancer too. I have
an uncle and my husband has an aunt that is also fighting cancer.
I did go into the Dr’s office in November, asking them to
check my hormone levels. I was
emotional, anxious, couldn’t sleep, gaining weight and my acne was out of
control. I was convinced that my
hormones were out of whack. Well, my
blood tests came back with everything in a normal range and I left with a
prescription for anti-depressants. I
don’t think that it helped that I broke out into tears when the Dr asked me if
we were going to start “trying” again. I
just get so frustrated trying to explain myself when someone asks me that
question. I left the office pissed that
I had that prescription, but my husband talked me into filling it. So I filled it and started taking it. It has made me feel better. I don’t think I obsess about single things
for hours like I have been doing the past few years. But the bad side affect is that I sleep so
much! These last few months I have had
the best sleep of my life! I kind of
wonder if that is really the thing that is making me feel better… having a
normal 8 hour sleep schedule has done wonders for my mood. Sadly, the late nights surfing the Internet
is when I did the majority of my blog writing and reading.
I do have good news.
We added new member to our family just before Christmas! The animals now outnumber the people in my
house.
She is the cutest little puppy
ever and I love her so much! This picture is of her (and my knees). We had to get a little sweater for her because the week we got her the temperature was below zero and she had a hard time going to the bathroom outside in the extreme cold. The sweater is a XS and now fits her better. She is a
mix of about 6 small dog breeds. She is
currently 4 ½ months old and weighs about 4 lbs. Everyone keeps asking me how big she will be
when she is fully grown, and I’m not really sure since she comes from so many
breeds of smaller dogs. We think she
will stay pretty little. Her mom is only
about 5 lbs. Unfortunately my cats were
not happy when we brought the puppy home.
The younger cat has learned to accept her, but the older cat is still
pretty pissed off about her. He
tolerates her as long as she stays away from him. We have already completed a 6 week puppy
training class (another thing that has taken away from my blogging time). Of course she was everyone’s favorite because
she was by far the smallest puppy in the class.
Now, if only we can get past the chewing phase… She chews on everything!
I’m still working on my graduate degree. I have just under a year left to complete my
program but I have been thinking about adding a few more classes and extending
my graduation date. I think this would
be good for my career, but I am so ready to be done with school and to have my
weekends back. I will have to decide in
a few months if I will be adding extra classes or not.
There have been a lot of pregnancies popping up that I am
dealing with. In June my husband and I
will have a total of 15 nieces and nephews!
That is not a typo, the number really is 15, and I’m sure it will keep
growing. My close friend is
pregnant. I wrote about expecting that to happen after I saw some baby books at her house back here. The announcements really haven’t been that
hard to deal with. The worst is that
feeling of being left behind when I hear an announcement, but that is part of
life that I accepted when we quit fertility treatments. I’m learning that this feeling will always be
a part of life.
I have been experimenting with cooking, new foods, and new
recipes. I have been reading about the
endo diet and trying to incorporate that into my life. I’m starting slowly and changing things
little by little. I think if I jumped in
full speed ahead into the diet I would hate it and it would only last a few
weeks. My husband has been a good
sport. Cooking has never been something
that came naturally to me, and we have had some disappointing dinners
lately! I think I would like to write
about this more when I find time. The
last month I have been able to feel some benefits from eating healthier.
I appreciate all of you, my friends out here on the
Internet. I am hoping that I will be
back soon. I passed my 1 year blog
anniversary on Feb 2nd and didn’t even realize it! I have a lot of reading and catching up to do
in blog land!